Hi friend!

Welcome back to Tales of Grace! I’m so grateful you’re here. Today, we’re continuing our Redefining Healing Series, and I want to share a part of my own healing journey with you.

In 2016, I walked through one of the most challenging moments of my faith journey. Two years earlier, I had attended the Sparkle Ladies Conference, where God planted a seed of hope in my heart. I truly believed that He would heal me completely. That year, I was baptized, declaring my trust in Him. But, as life often goes, things didn’t unfold the way I expected.

Much like Cleopas in Luke 24, I had hoped and trusted God for supernatural healing, believing that my healing would come miraculously and that I would soon be free from the disease that weighed so heavily on my heart. In 2016, with hopeful anticipation, I went for another test, expecting to see evidence of the miracle I had prayed for. But the results? They weren’t what I hoped for. My heart shattered as I read the word “positive” on the test results.

In that moment, I felt the weight of crushing disappointment. My mind swirled with questions: Why didn’t God heal me? Had I not prayed enough? Was my faith not strong enough? It felt like my hope had been ripped away, and I found myself drowning in a sea of doubt and confusion.

As I sat in the stillness of that devastating moment, tears streaming down my face, I cried out to God. And in the midst of my anguish, His words came to me: “It’s not for you to understand but for you to trust me. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” (Isaiah 55:9).

I won’t lie to you—those words didn’t take away my pain. But they challenged me to see things from a new perspective. Healing didn’t come the way I expected, but that didn’t mean God wasn’t working in my life. Slowly, I began to understand that His plans are often different from ours. Yet they are always for our good.

I’d like to say that this revelation immediately filled me with peace. But it didn’t, trusting God amid disappointment is a process. I resisted taking the medical treatment available to me because I felt it symbolized defeat. But God, in His patient love, continued to nudge me forward. Earlier in 2017, I began ARV treatment because I struggled with paranoia (a story for another day). The journey wasn’t easy—the side effects were difficult, and taking the medication brought painful reminders of what was done to me. But day by day, God showed me that healing doesn’t always look the way we expect.

Healing didn’t come in the form of a miraculous disappearance of my illness, but it came in the strength to persevere. It came in the scriptures that reminded me of God’s unfailing love, such as Jeremiah 29:11:

“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

It came in the people He placed around me—friends, counselors, and church leaders who walked with me through my struggles.

Through this journey, I continue to learn that God’s healing is not always about changing our circumstances. Sometimes, it’s about transforming our hearts. He has taught me to trust Him in ways I never thought possible, to find hope even in the face of disappointment, and to believe that His plans for my life are still good.

Friend, I don’t know where you find yourself right this moment. Maybe you’re grappling with disappointment, wondering why healing hasn’t come the way you expected, I want to encourage you. God sees you. He hears your cries and knows your pain. Though His answers may not align with your expectations, they are rooted in a love that is far beyond our comprehension. Trust Him in the waiting. He is faithful to complete the work He has started in you (Philippians 1:6).

Healing may not always look the way we envision it, but it is always part of God’s perfect plan. And as we lean into Him, we discover that His presence is the greatest healing of all.

If this post spoke to you, would you share it with someone who might be encouraged? And if you feel led, I’d love to hear your story! I know it can be tough to open up, especially on the internet, but if my journey helps even one person feel seen and loved by God, it’s worth it. So, if you feel stirred to share your story, do it! God honors obedience. You didn’t go through all of that just to keep it to yourself.

Also, don’t forget that I’ll be pre-launching the Loved Beyond Measure journal on February 14th, so stay tuned! Follow @talesofgrace.blog on Instagram to catch the early bird discount.

With love and grace,
The Founder of Tales of Grace